I’ve been thinking a lot about waiting lately, reflecting on Tanya Marlow’s new book. Today I’m linking up with other blogs on this subject, and offering this little piece of waiting of my own.
This is part of the synchroblog on waiting, to celebrate the release of Those Who Wait: Finding God in Disappointment, Doubt and Delay by Tanya Marlow – out now. See more here and link up to the synchroblog here.
Waiting in a crowd of baying teens,
P.E in frozen rain in December 1985,
hanging my head at the back,
shame heavy in my stomach
Not chosen. Not chosen. Going to be last,
going to be shoved out in the cold.
Can’t run as fast. Can’t play as well as them. Can’t do this.
The pathetic one.
Waiting for the healing.
‘Aren’t you better yet? You look so well!’
Waiting for the pain to flee away.
The pain that grips so tight, clenching iron-like around my chest,
Waiting for God to ease. To gather it up and fling it far from me.
Waiting in arms of inexpressible love
and depths of inexpressible joy,
but waiting, still.
When will you come, God? When?
My tears have been my food day and night, says the psalmist, but then
deep still calls to deep.
Still I find rest for my soul,
strength for limbs which have none left,
peace beyond comprehension, and
far beyond that.
Deep still calls to deep
In the roar of waterfalls of something beyond
Waiting in groaning expectation
For everything to be
Those Who Wait: Finding God in Doubt, Disappointment and Delay – Tanya Marlow (Malcolm Down 2017) is a creative journey through the lives of four biblical saints who waited impatiently. It’s for anyone who is waiting for something, (which is all of us), but struggles with it, (which is most of us).
For more details, including the special introductory offer, click here.